How to recognize and release your emotions
We were designed by God to be emotional, every one of us. That doesn’t mean we are controlled by our emotions, or that we are expressive people (many of us are not). Being emotional means we are all experiencing lots of emotions all day long, even if we are unaware of it.
The more we can be in touch with the emotional part of our brains and allow those emotions to flow through us and not get repressed or stuck, the healthier we will be. Understanding our emotions also helps us to communicate about our hearts and our needs in healthier ways.
5 Important things to know about your emotions
There are no “bad emotions”. All emotions were created by God and serve as messengers if we pay attention to them. Paying attention and processing them is different than being overwhelmed by them or allowing them to control you.
Emotions just happen to us; we don’t choose them. We do get to choose our behaviors.
Science indicates that we can move through emotions in as short as 19 seconds when we process the core emotion we are experiencing.
There are 8 core emotions we all experience every day in tiny or large amounts, and we can learn to recognize and process those emotions regularly for better mental and whole body health.
We were designed to have a river of emotions flowing through us all the time. When we don’t process our emotions, they get dammed up inside us and we become a less healthy version of ourselves.
How do I process and release my emotions?
If you are not used to noticing your emotions, they may be hard to discern initially. But know that all 8 core emotions are actually happening to you every day, and with practice, you will get good at recognizing them.
1.What emotions am I experiencing?
Ask yourself, what is happening with me? Look at the core emotion wheel and see where you can find each emotion in yourself now or recently.
2. What is happening with that emotion?
Ask yourself. If I feel fear, what am I fearful about? What thoughts are connected to each emotion. Take notice of these emotions and thoughts without self-judgment.
3. Get to the core.
If you get a sense there is something else beneath that emotion, keep digging until you get to the core emotion(s). For example, you might feel angry at another person, but then realize underneath that is actually hurt from something they did. That is likely the core emotion. Once you have located the core emotions you are experiencing, you can spend more time processing or journaling through the big ones, and pray through any difficult situations that have come to mind.
4. Try to spend a few minutes on this exercise daily.
See the example below to understand how you can process your emotions daily in just a few minutes.
Sample of the Daily Practice - Release step
This is one example of completing a core emotion wheel, including finding out what’s happening with each of the emotions. You can say your core emotion wheel aloud, write each one down, or share them with a trusted person. If you struggle with coming up with an example for any of the emotions, don’t skip it! Just think of the last time you felt it, or the biggest experience you have had with that emotion.
Anger - I felt a little anger when I noticed that my daughter left crumbs on the couch and didn’t clean up after herself.
Shame - I was having a little anxiety this morning and felt some shame that I still struggle with anxiety sometimes.
Guilt - I have some guilt that I had to cancel plans with a friend tomorrow.
Fear - I have fear about a work assignment coming up that I feel unprepared for.
Lonely - I have been feeling some loneliness as my kids get older and spend less time at home.
Sad - I feel some sadness that I was not with my family for the holidays.
Hurt - I felt hurt when my teenager was disrespectful.
Joy - I feel joy that my husband will be returning from a work trip soon.
More Resources
Learn more about Connection Codes
Download a free core emotion wheel
Get the Connection Codes Foundations course
Book a coaching session with Angie Gibbons to grow in emotional freedom and health
